Friday, August 11, 2017

#WriterRamblings - Positivity, please

If you've read KAUFMAN (Austin Arrows, 2), then you might be familiar with my thought process in regard to the power of positive thinking. In the book, Noelle sends out only positive messages to the universe in hopes of having positive energy returned to her life. Sound familiar? Well, if you've read The Secret by Rhonda Byrne then you might be familiar with it.


Personally, I'm a huge fan of the book. I'm also a huge fan of Joel Osteen and the positive message that he sends through his sermons and books. I find that I need that in my life to help push me each and every day. Did I mention that I also read my horoscope every day? Well, I do. It's a positive message that lifts my spirits.


But this isn't a post to promote my book or anyone else's. I've been giving this topic some thought these past few days and I thought I'd kick off my #WriterRamblings series with this.

So, as I sit here writing this post, I find myself deleting paragraph after paragraph as I hint on the negativity that seems to overwhelm everything these days. It's there, I can't deny that. Everywhere I turn, there's something negative that could very easily sway me in a dark direction. But, that's not the point of this post. I'm not here to point fingers or to determine who is right or wrong. That's not my job, nor is it my responsibility.

Now, I know you've visited social media and seen examples of the negative energy. A lot of people claim that it's the "book world" that has turned around. I don't buy that shit for a second. The book world is made up of people. Whether it's authors, bloggers, readers, publishers, editors, or the person who stocks the shelves at the book store, that's who makes up this book world. And we are responsible for our own outlook.

The "book world" didn't turn negative. We did and we allow that negativity to eat away at all our positive energy until the only thing we think about is why we aren't getting exactly what we want. Are we supposed to get what we want? Was there ever a guarantee that if we want it, we shall have it? Nope. When did being entitled become a thing? No, seriously. When?

Things happen. Seasons change as do trends. 

I don't want to hear that there are too many authors and too many books and that's why nothing goes the way it should. Really? As a reader, I can tell you, there will never be too many authors or too many books. Never.

And yes, I'm an author. But I'm a reader first. 

Then again, as an author, I don't see other authors as my competition. I see them as opportunities for me. Opportunities for a new friendship, for a new perspective, for a new inspiration. For every "new" author, I have the potential to find a favorite read. For every "old" author, I have the potential to find a favorite read. I know for an absolute fact that there isn't a single author out there who went to publish their book and thought, "Hmm. I think my book is better than Nicole Edwards's book." Why would they do that? Why would they care about me at all? They don't. And they shouldn't.

However, that's something I see all the time. One author against another. It makes absolutely no sense to me. The same goes for blogger against blogger, reader against reader, and so on and so forth.

Do you know how many times I've felt as though someone has wronged me these past five years? Plenty. However, you won't find me calling them out directly. Not publicly, anyway. Sure, my husband might have to endure one of my tirades when I'm fed up with the shit that rides the fine edge of my last nerve. But, he knows he's going to hear that from me. He married me. He agreed to hear me out. (Whether he knows it or not) However, those people who follow me on social media did not sign up to hear me bitch and moan about that.

I'm not one to start drama or get myself involved in it because as we've all seen too many times, it doesn't generally play out in a manner that leaves us feeling good about ourselves. Personally, I have enough to deal with.

So, what do I do when someone has rubbed me the wrong way? Well, most of the time I sit down at my computer and I write them a personal note. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't send it to them. I'm not an idiot. I'm not here to make enemies. However, I find that if I can get it out of my head then I'm better off for it later. It's a mental thing, I guess.

How I deal with it isn't important. What's important is that we look within ourselves and do something that will change the world and ourselves for the better. But, you can't fix anyone else. At least, I haven't found that possible. The only person I can change is myself.

And if you're thinking, "Hey, Nicole. Do you have a point?", well, the answer is ... probably not. I've simply been giving this some thought. I'm looking at ways to improve my outlook. And, you, my friend, opted to listen to my ramblings for the day. This is it.

Hopefully, if nothing else, I've enlightened you on how I work to add positivity to my own life. It's a personal choice.

Lotsa love!

~Nicole

**Edited to note that this post was written prior to seeing any recent negativity related to particular books. I can state right now that I do not have an opinion on what is taking place. Like I mention above, it is not my place to judge others, therefore, I choose not to**

5 comments:

  1. You are absolutely right and I loved reading this.

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  2. Personally, if someone has an issue with me, I want to know about it because I do learn from my mistakes, from how my actions affect others, and I change for the better (I hope). So sometimes, when you're writing your notes to others who have pissed you off or wronged you in someway, maybe consider who the person is and if that person would listen to your concerns and take them to heart. We can't grow as individuals, can't alter bad behavior if we don't know what we're doing is bad. And I often react defensively at first when my bad behaviors are pointed out. But I always apologize for my actions (and possibly reactions), even if it takes a period of contemplation first.
    Anyway, you're right about the negativity being owned by individuals. I totally own my terror -- I know where my head is right now. I'm trying to redirect myself back to a happier place, but that's something I can't explain.
    As to the current issue in the book world -- I will defend any writer's right to scribe whatever they want (less hate speech) and any reader's right to read whatever they want. It's a Constitutional freedom we're blessed with. And I can't personally read the book in question. But I'll still defend it.
    I hope everyone has a great weekend!
    The Card Fairy!

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    1. So... What is the book in question? I want to know so I can read it! I don't have a clue what all the hubbub is about. I LOVE Nicole's books and I don't pay much attention to social media - I'm too busy reading.

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  3. I love this post. My husband, Doug, passed away suddenly and since then it's hard to be positive. But I do like and will keep the "Positive Mind, Positive Life, Positive Vibes" in the front of my memory to try and be positive.

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  4. Nicole, my Nana whom I adored always said "this too shall pass." That works. Sometimes. Other times, I like what I say. "Fuck them and the horse they rode in on." That works too. Keep your chin up girlfriend. You have so many people who are rooting for you and supporting you.

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